So I have used over the last few years a every one I mentioned above to the point of knowing how to deal with them for day to day use, how to configure them and more, so the problem is not a usability problem.
My question is how should I pick the right OS for my privacy/security needs? I have used Qubes but I don’t like that isn’t usable for GPU related stuff. Also as I said in the tile I have used hardened linux distros and most of them worked for me without any major issues(except selinux stuff), also I have used Hardened BSD and it was great.
Now I’m not a targeted person and mostly I use my laptop for programing and playing around with FOSS software.
You have stated what you think you want but you did not even mention your day to day use case and what exactly do you want it to harden from.
This sounds like some proprietary stuff. Mainstream gaming and graphics related use cases seems to have the need for these kinds of things and the best thing you could do to have both worlds (or multiworlds) is to segregate your use cases to specific devices, and if you could, do network isolation.
Have a dedicated unprivate but secure device for gaming/media consumption. Have another for your online digitally secure and private presence for online. Another secure mobile phone (GrapheneOS), etc…
I said that I use it for programming and testing foss software mostly(and other day to day stuff like watching youtube, reading news… that don’t really need security).
For the GPU stuff is just for media consumption that I do(like watching tutorials and courses) where is the most annoying as I need the CPU to be less used by software rendering(qubes only issue)
Just install fedora, and be done with it. If you want to use your GPU Qubes-OS won’t be a suitable option.
Now I’m not a targeted person and mostly I use my laptop for programing and playing around with FOSS software.
You may find containers, in particular tools like https://containertoolbx.org/ useful. Alternatively look into Silverblue.
There isn’t a whole lot to gain from using a “hardened” Linux/BSD for a desktop distribution on a laptop. More is the point if you don’t know what any of the hardening actually does/accomplishes then this isn’t the right option for you.